Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Kirishima is in the doctor’s office, sat on top of the exam table, his legs swinging back and forth nervously. His moms each sit in a chair next to him, also looking equally—if not more—anxious. Finally, there’s a knock at the door, a sound which makes Kirishima’s heart start to race in anticipation.

The doctor settles in their chair, hands resting on the keyboard atop their desk as they look over at Kirishima with a critical but kind gaze. As expected, they gently ask, “Can you tell me about when this all started?”

Kirishima takes a deep breath, steeling his nerves before he begins.

A four-year-old Kirishima is running around at a friend’s birthday party, completely and utterly carefree. A still-aching scar rests on his forehead, but he pays it no mind, too caught up in his game of tag. As he reaches out to tag one of the other kids, he has to pull away quickly, hearing his mom’s voice suddenly sound in his mind as he watches his hand transform involuntarily.

“Be careful not to accidentally use your quirk again, you might hurt other people, not just yourself.”

Kirishima looks down at his now rock-solid hand, his eyebrow furrowing as he tries to revert it back. Before he can, a tall, elegantly dressed woman suddenly approaches him—probably a parent of one of the kids running around. She reaches out a perfectly manicured hand, carefully and gently taking his hand into hers, shaking her head softly.

“You poor thing. This quirk really is so unseemly for a little girl to have.” Her voice has a hard edge to it and Kirishima looks up at her, curious eyes meeting pitiful ones. What does unseemly mean? He’d have to ask his moms later but for now he tries to give the strange woman a polite nod. Speaking of, he can now see his mama walking over from where she had been standing and talking a few feet away, her face pulled into a frown.

The woman quickly pulls back upon seeing Kirishima’s mama stepping closer, dropping the boy’s hand as if it burned her. The two women are now standing face-to-face, just a foot apart and Kirishima can see that they’re both frowning. He can’t imagine why, though, didn’t the lady just give him a nice compliment?

His mama suddenly turns to him, bending down slightly to meet his level, a pleasant smile now on her face. “Hey sweetie, why don’t you go and keep playing with your friends? Mama just wants to have a little chat with this nice lady here.” Kirishima nods excitedly, stomping off towards where the kids have now gathered at the other side of the playground.

Kirishima is not completely out of earshot before he can overhear two raised, angry-sounding voices, “You don’t get to talk about my kid like that, especially not to her face, that was completely out of line.” That one sounds like mama, but in a sharp tone that he’s never heard her use before.

“Oh please, I’m just saying what everyone is thinking. You must realize how unbecoming it is for such a pretty little girl to have such an unsightly ability, along with that unwieldy scar!” And that voice sounds like that nice lady he just talked to, but she also sounds upset like his mama. Kirishima wanted to turn around and keep listening out of curiosity, but then caught a glimpse of what the other kids were crowded around.

A puppy! He dashes over quickly, wanting to also get a chance to pet it.

An eight-year-old Kirishima is sitting in his room, curled up into a ball on the floor, a foot or two away from the full-length mirror on his wall. A shirt lays discarded next to him, a package of small training bras on the other side, only one has been removed. He cries near-silently into his knees, not wanting his moms to hear him and come check on him.

He had insisted on going to the store with them, and they had encouraged him to pick these up while they were out, saying something about Kirishima needing them later on. They explained a little more in the car ride back—once they were no longer in a public space.

Kirishima had immediately gone to his room to try one out, excited but completely unsure of what to expect. However, it was not how his moms said it would be; instead of feeling all grown up, he just felt outright disgusted. He grips onto his arms tighter, trying to stifle the desire to crawl out of his skin. This wasn’t right, there was something wrong with him.

It was even worse when Kirishima returned to school after the break.

“Ew, Kirishima has girl cooties!” One of his friends yelled, running just out of reach of Kirishima and giggling.

“Gross!” Another chimed in.

“Cooties! Cooties!” They started to chant as they all sprinted down the hall and away from Kirishima.

He never got a chance to even talk to his friends again, seeing as they were all boys and all-in on whatever “cooties” were. Kirishima began to eat his lunch in the library with only the librarian as his company. He couldn’t handle how all his friends clambered to eat in the corner of the classroom furthest from Kirishima, whispering about him the whole time. The librarian was nice and allowed him to stay with her since he was such a polite student, but he longed to spend time with his friends again.

When he went out for recess, the boys just kept either running from him or pushing him to the ground—all without a proper explanation as to why. Eventually Kirishima just stopped trying to play with anyone during break times, unsure of who wouldn’t treat him this way.

Though, it didn’t end there; now that the boys had all but abandoned him, the girls took an interest. Not a positive one, though, as they pulled at his clothes and laughed in his face. “Ew! Who would wear those? You’re such a weirdo!” One girl yelled from across the school playground one day.

Kirishima found all of this very strange and confusing. He had never heard of anything called “cooties” before, and everyone refused to explain it to him, just laughing whenever he asked. He had also been wearing clothes from the boys’ section ever since his moms allowed him to start picking out his own outfits. It had never been such a big deal before, Kirishima had no idea what changed to make them treat him this way.

Was it something he did wrong? It must’ve been.

A ten-year-old Kirishima is sitting down to eat dinner with his moms and their extended family. They’re at Kirishima’s grandparents’ house and the boy looks across the long wooden table when he hears his grandma call his name.

“What do you want to be when you grow up, my child?” She asks in her usual gentle, patient tone.

Kirishima excitedly blurts out, “I wanna be a manly hero like Crimson Riot!” He had recently come to adore the hero, watching footage of him fighting bad guys like he was completely fearless. His moms joke that every time the hero comes on screen Kirishima looks like there’s stars in his eyes.

The table goes quiet suddenly, before his grandma hesitantly replies, “Oh, that’s nice, dearie. That’s your favorite hero isn’t it?” Kirishima nods enthusiastically.

He resists the urge to start talking about Crimson Riot when he notices the weird tension that has formed, his other family members still silent. Kirishima swears he sees his aunt shake her head out of the corner of his eye and his uncle simply crosses his arms.

His older cousin laughs, kicking Kirishima’s shin from underneath the table, “You can’t be manly like him, you’re a girl, idiot!”

“I think that’s a fine dream to have.” Kirishima’s grandpa finally spoke up, to which everyone finally dropped the subject and moved on. Although, he could still hear one of his moms getting on his cousin’s case for calling him an idiot and kicking him.

A thirteen-year-old Kirishima is sitting in the living room with his moms, the three of them snuggled on the couch, trying to find a movie to watch. Kirishima wasn’t sure how much longer he could take of not telling them, it felt like he was hiding his real self from them, like he was lying to them and betraying their trust in him.

Two years ago, he finally found out what this feeling is, the one that makes him want to peel off his skin and tear off his flesh. The person in the video called it “gender dysphoria” and described an experience very similar to Kirishima’s. It was then that he realized for the first time that he was not alone.

He had meant to tell them several times before, but it always ended up not being the right time; they’d get interrupted or he would simply choke up and blank on what he planned to say.

This time, Kirishima is determined to say something. There couldn’t be any interruptions, seeing as it was a late night on a weekend, and Kirishima had rehearsed so much he could say the words in his sleep.

“Just living a life with no regrets— that’s what chivalry means to me.” Crimson Riot’s words rang through his mind as he took a deep breath to try and calm his nerves.

It was now or never, “Mom, Mama? I think I’m transgender. Like, I want to be a boy and I feel really uncomfortable with being a girl, I think I have gender dysphoria or something. I-I’d like you to refer to me as a boy and call me Eijiro now. I hope that’s okay.” The words tumbled out of his mouth all at once, a lot less gracefully than he had planned. It was too late now, though, his feelings were finally out in the open.

For that brief moment of silence, all Eijiro could hear was the sound of his own pounding heart beating in his ears. That moment when his moms turned to face him, his mama completely dropping the tv remote. Suddenly, Eijiro can feel two pairs of arms wrapped around him, his moms holding him in a warm, comforting embrace.

He can hear that his mom is crying as she manages to say, “Oh, Eijiro, we would never want to control who you are or how you feel. We love you no matter what your gender or sexuality is. You’ll always be our little pride and joy.”

His mama then hummed in agreement before adding, “We love you, Eijiro.”

That’s when Eijiro started to cry, too, sobbing openly while being held securely in his moms’ arms. He knew they would probably be accepting, seeing as they’re both queer themselves, but it was no less nerve wracking to admit to another person out loud.

However, the pain was still far from over for him, and he would face a whole new wave of even worse problems at school. Fortunately, he had his moms by his side as they navigated therapy appointments and school meetings. It was an uphill climb to get the school to accept Eijiro’s identity and name, but eventually the staff conceded, even allowing him a male uniform.

On the therapy side, Eijiro had to make multiple attempts but after his 5th therapist, he finally found someone who understood him and listened to him without judgment. She was even queer herself and specialized in helping other queer youth struggling with mental health or their identities. Every time Eijiro attended an appointment with her, he left feeling light—as if an invisible weight had been lifted from his chest; albeit temporarily.

Trying to get the students on board was a whole other struggle, one that Eijiro ultimately could not win. He would try his absolute hardest to get the other students to like him, though.

“I can do your homework for you, if you want.” Eijiro offered to a girl who had been glaring at him and shoving him around just yesterday. She gave him an obviously fakely sweet smile, but he still hoped at least part of it was genuine.

To a different student he asked, “Would you like to borrow my notes? I can always make new ones for myself.” The sharp-eyed boy raised an eyebrow before snatching the papers from Eijiro’s hands. The other boy didn’t reply but at least Eijiro didn’t get verbally assaulted by him that day.

“My mom packed me this nice bento today, do you want it?” A different but equally mean girl looked him up and down before glancing at the box Eijiro held. Her sharp nose wrinkled in disgust at what she saw before she elegantly smacked his lunch out of his hands.

Eijiro got down on his hands and knees, trying to clean up the mess and he could hear his classmates snickering. “Oh my god, is she going to eat it off the floor like the gross dog she is? I’ve never seen an uglier, more pathetic tranny in my life.” The girl mocked, her words razor-sharp as they hit Eijiro like a physical blow.

Suffice to say, his efforts were futile.

It was extremely hard for Eijiro to fight back when they continued to relentlessly pick on him, not only because of his peaceful, people-pleasing nature. After all, everyone already knew about his quirk and so they were able to leave Eijiro physically unscathed while still tormenting him day-in and day-out; knowing he couldn’t lay a hand on them in retaliation.

Any of the people Eijiro had managed to befriend in his earlier years of middle school were all turned against him, each of them stabbing him in the back as others watched and laughed. Not one of them tried to stand up for him, succumbing to the pressure put on them by their peers to join in. If it was Eijiro who was being harassed then that meant they would be safe from the same treatment so long as they distanced themselves from him.

In one last-ditch effort to be friendly and kind, he tried to ask one of the kids why they were being so mean to him, to which they laughed and leaned in close. “Because you’re just an unnatural freak who needs to be put in her place and brought out of her delusions. You can’t just decide you want to be a boy, that’s not how this works. That’s not how God intended you, you fucking faggot.”

Eijiro’s moms would reassure him later when he arrived home that day, eyes red and puffy. Unfortunately, they would be unable to actually help stop the bullying, seeing as there was no physical evidence. All they could do was try to cheer him up wherever he had a particularly bad day like today.

His mama came up with the idea to help him cut his hair—something that they hadn’t quite gotten around to since they’ve been busy. His mom then chimed in, “We could even dye your hair, if you wanted. You are a teenager now so it’s only fair.”

The boy’s eyes lit up as he began to grin from ear to ear. He already knew exactly what color to do. His moms smiled at each other knowingly, both very aware of Eijiro’s love of the color red due to it reminding him of his idol Crimson Riot.

When Eijiro walked into his bedroom later that night, he sat on his bed and looked over all the posters on his walls. He wished he could be half as strong and manly as Crimson Riot; sometimes he even wished that he could simply be him. It’s then that an idea pops into Eijiro’s head.

He gets up and moves over to his desk chair, pulling his laptop open quickly and typing into the YouTube search bar: ftm voice training class. In another tab, crimson riot interview. He hits enter.

The doctor nods at Eijiro, having typed notes into her computer at random intervals throughout his summary of the past several years of his life. “Thank you for telling me all this, I know you’ve already discussed it during your assessment, but I wanted to hear it directly from you first.” Eijiro nodded in understanding before she continued, “I think we can help you, you had indicated you wanted hormone therapy, correct?”

“Yes.”

Chapter Text

The letter from UA arrived just a few days ago, Eijiro’s mom quickly and excitedly handed it to him before gathering the family together on the couch. His moms watched as Eijiro opened and read it, his face splitting into an uncontrollable grin partway through that made his moms each tear up a little.

He had passed with flying colors, managing to snag second place and he’s presumably behind that one guy Eijiro had seen blowing through the faux villains like they weren’t made out of military–grade steel. Meanwhile, Eijiro was just trying to do his best to ensure he wouldn’t fail, so he ended up getting a lot farther than he thought he did.

“We’re so proud of you.” His mom said as tears spilled down her cheeks, taking Eijiro’s free hand in hers as he lowered the letter to his lap.

“Our boy’s going to be a hero!” His mama cheered, though he could see that she was trying really hard to not start crying as well.

The scene felt strikingly familiar, suddenly reminding Eijiro of the time he had come out to his parents. A similar feeling rose up in his chest; a mixture of relief, happiness and excitement—though this time he could also feel a twinge of anxiety.

A new school typically brings with it many challenges, but judging from the name the letter was addressed to, it seems as if UA would make things easier this time around.

Eijiro glances up once more at the impressive school building, standing with his moms at his sides; his assumption had been confirmed. The three of them find their way around the halls, eventually ending up just outside of the principal’s office. Eijiro nervously reaches out to knock gently on the door—now trained enough to not worry about punching a hole in it accidentally.

A short man with mouse-like features opens the door, welcoming them in and leading them to a couch on one side of the room. A second man with long, dark hair and dark circles under his eyes is sitting across from them on a second couch, a coffee table lying in the space between them.

The shorter man gently closes the door before approaching the group, “Welcome to UA, my name is Nezu, I’m the principal of this fine school and here with me is one of our lovely teachers, Mr. Aizawa.” As he speaks, Nezu gestures to the man sitting on the opposite couch before continuing, “You both must be Mrs. and Mrs. Kirishima, and this must be your son Eijiro. Before we start, would any of you care for some tea?”

Eijiro and his moms politely decline, so Nezu finally settles down on the couch next to Aizawa, each of them perched on one end. It’s then that Nezu speaks up again, “I’m sure the three of you are well aware, but here at UA, we do our best to be inclusive and welcoming of all our students. In trying to create a comfortable and safe learning environment, we like to have meetings like this with any students who may need some extra support. For your case in particular, Eijiro, there are a few things that we can do. I’ll let Mr. Aizawa explain.”

“We do have a system in place where we can change your gender and name to your preference. When necessary, your legal name will still be on file in certain areas. We also have a few all-gender bathrooms that, for your safety, we would recommend you use if you are uncomfortable using the womens’. These would be in the nurse’s office, the staff rooms, and next to the changing rooms for PE class. You can also use the one by the lockers in order to change out if that’s more comfortable than changing with the girls.” Aizawa explained in a mostly monotone, gravelly voice. Coupled with his appearance and tired expression, it seemed as if he hadn’t slept for days now.

Nezu then interjected, “What do you think?”

“Honestly, I think that all sounds great, thank you so much!” Eijiro gave a slight bow, which his moms reflected.

“You’ll just need to fill out this form right here so we can finalize the updates to your school records.” Aizawa procured a piece of paper seemingly out of thin air, setting it on the coffee table along with a pen. Eijiro nodded, grabbing the pen and getting to work, letting his moms take over wherever their signatures were required.

Aizawa grabs the filled out form as Nezu says, “Alright, all that’s left is for you to visit our school’s nurse, we need to have a file on your medicine and hormone levels.”

Eijiro nodded and the three of them started to get up, giving one last bow and ‘thank you’ before leaving.

Eijiro is now sitting on an exam table in an offshoot room of the nurse’s office, the old woman—who introduced herself as Recovery Girl—sitting in an office chair in front of a computer. His moms are waiting outside in the main room of the office, not wanting to be a bother to a pro hero who knows what she’s doing.

The boy continues to flex the fingers of his right hand, a piece of gauze taped to the vein of his arm. Recovery Girl finally turns away from where she was studying the results of his blood test. “Good news, your hormone levels are pretty stable. I think it’s safe to say that I can take over for your regular checkups while you’re here at UA. I’d like to keep a close eye on you myself to certify that your levels are balanced enough to not interfere with your fighting or learning.”

“Thank you so much!” Eijiro replies excitedly, giving another slight bow.

“You’re welcome, young man. Now, I’ll print you a letter for your doctor to explain the change, along with these documents for your moms to keep for your records.”

Once the pages were all printed from next to Recovery Girl’s computer, she handed them to Eijiro before gently guiding him back out to the main room of her office. She gave the same rundown to his moms, who politely thanked her. Eijiro handed his mama the paperwork and then the three of them were sent on their way.

It’s the night before Eijiro’s first day at UA and he’s busy packing up all the school supplies he’ll need into his worn, dark red backpack. He glances over the couple of pride pins he’s stuck to the front of it over the years—they’ll probably need to be cleaned up before he goes to bed seeing as they’ve already become dingy.

He’s interrupted, though, when he hears a knock at his door. “Eijiro, sweetie, your mama and I would like to talk to you really quick before you go to bed.” His mom’s voice comes through the door gently.

“Sure! Give me a sec.” Eijiro sets his backpack back down on the floor next to his desk, the surface of which is already covered in various supplies they bought at the stationary store. He then turns around and opens his door, which both of his moms are now standing behind. Eijiro takes their cue and goes to sit down in his desk chair, his moms settling on the edge of his bed. “What’s up?”

“Well, we were thinking about how badly you were picked on last year, and we wanted to figure out what to do to make sure that doesn’t happen again.” His mom explains, mentioning the exact thing Eijiro had been trying not to worry about.

“I mean, it’s a school full of people wanting to be heroes, though, right?” He interjects nervously.

“Of course, we’re not saying these kids are automatically going to be mean, we’re just worried about you. No matter who the people are, there’s always going to be someone who isn’t going to welcome you. Whatever you want to do, we’ll support your decision.” His mama chimes in.

Eijiro hadn’t thought about that. Sure, these kids were probably going after the same goal as him, but there have been a couple heroes who were outed for various terrible actions, especially when they were younger.

Memories of being purposely bumped into, called slurs and names, mocked, and left as a social outcast surfaced to Eijiro’s mind. He clenched his fists, trying to will the flashback away, to minimal results. He never wanted to go through that ever again.

“What if I just… went stealth? At least for a little while? I know it’s not very manly of me.” Eijiro carefully proposes, watching the expressions on his moms’ faces.

His mom’s eyes welled up with tears as she forced a small smile and said, “If that’s what you think would make you the most safe and comfortable, we can do that.”

His mama added, with furrowed brows, “We don’t want to force you to do anything that you don’t want to, but it’s not unmanly of you to protect yourself.”

“No, I don’t feel pressured but I guess you’re right.”

“Alright, I’ll send your homeroom teacher an email about it so you’re not accidentally outed. Be sure to get to bed soon, you don’t want to be tired tomorrow.”

“I will, thank you mama.”

His moms both came over to wrap him up in a big hug before leaving the room, shutting the door once more behind them. Eijiro turned back to his backpack. I guess the pins won’t need cleaning after all. He does decide to leave the rainbow flag alone though; the last thing he’d want to do is to pretend like he’s not queer at all.

Eijiro bolts upright in bed the moment he hears his alarm clock start to go off. He taps the button dismissing it before throwing off the covers and practically leaping out of bed. He approaches his dresser, grabbing the uniform on top which he had received during his visit to the school.

He quickly pulls off his pajamas, tossing them into his laundry bin before grabbing a binder from one of the drawers. It only takes him a couple minutes to pull it on, having lots of practice from many days of wearing it before.

He steps through the torso/neck hole, pulling the upside-down & inside-out material up and over his hips before slipping his arms into the arm holes and flipping it back right-side-out. He makes a couple adjustments to the shoulders and hem before looking into the mirror across from him.

The boy nods at his reflection before turning back to his uniform, tackling the pants first. He quickly pulls them up, letting them rest on his hips before threading the belt through to fully secure them. Next, he pulls on his button-up shirt, the buttons of which he fumbles with for a few moments. He then grabs his tie, approaching the mirror before staring into the reflection and tying it the way he had learned from YouTube videos.

Finally, he pulls on his jacket and takes one last look into the mirror. For once, Eijiro’s unable to find anything that can really mark him as female. He appreciates just how much the jacket helps to cover the slight still-there curve of his chest. It even helps to make his shoulders look more broad, creating a very masculine silhouette.

He can’t help but grin at the boy in the mirror who reflects back his shark-toothed smile. Eijiro hears a voice down the hall, “Breakfast is ready!” He quickly grabs his bag from where he left it on his desk before opening the door and heading out to the kitchen.

He scarfs down his eggs and toast, to which his mama comes over from where she was standing by the stove to place one hand on his back. “Slow down! You’re not going to be late, you’re already making good time.” She scolds lightly with a smile in her voice. “Have a good day today.”

Eijiro gulps down some juice before replying, “You too, mama.” She gives him a hug before turning to leave for work. When Eijiro returns to his food, he does make sure to eat a little slower.

Class 1-A is filled with all sorts of different students, each with their own unique quirks and personalities. Eijiro has only just taken in the sight of the classroom he’ll spend the next year in, but he can already pick up on the chaotic energy radiating from the group. One person stands out to him, though.

There’s a blond, spiky-haired guy haphazardly sprawled across one of the chairs, his legs on the desk and a scowl on his face. It’s the same guy that Eijiro had seen breezing through their exam, and who he suspected was the one in the top rank. Now that Eijiro gets a closer look at him without impending danger around them, he’s actually pretty attractive.

Hell, for all I know he’s straight and hates queer people. It’s then that Eijiro feels a crimson glare fixated on him. He doesn’t miss a beat before meeting the blond’s gaze and giving a friendly smile and wave, “Hey man! Saw you did really well on the exam. My name’s Kirishima, what’s yours?”

The other boy just huffed at his upbeat attitude, crossing his arms and grumbling, “Bakugo.”

Eijiro got the hint that he was done talking, so he went and found an open seat to sit down fully. A couple more students filtered in as Eijiro got to know a couple of classmates, a lingering feeling of nervousness present despite outwardly appearing to be friendly and confident. Eventually, all the seats were filled and the class really started to chatter away as they waited for someone to come in and give them direction.

Eventually, their homeroom teacher finally mysteriously appeared in a yellow sleeping bag and introduced himself as Mr. Aizawa—the same man who helped Eijiro just a week ago. To everyone’s surprise, the first activity of their first day of school was to test their quirks.

Throughout the activity, Eijiro couldn’t help his eyes drifting to Bakugo. He was ridiculously strong and very hotheaded, sure, but his temper seemed to be hiding something. Eijiro tried his best to refocus on the task at hand though, determined to not be dropped from the program he had worked so hard to join.

Now was his chance to verifiably prove just how much he had improved upon his quirk and abilities.

Ow… why did I do this to myself… Eijiro thought as he slowly peeled off his sweat-soaked binder. Everything hurt and it was all he could do to not start crying in the bathroom. By now he must be the last one left to leave—hopefully Aizawa will be forgiving just this time.

After a good few minutes of painfully wrestling with the fabric, he finally got it off and moved to pat himself off and get changed. Eijiro pulled out the spare sports bra he kept in his backpack, trading it for his binder before pulling on his uniform. He didn’t really have time to check his appearance in the mirror so he’d just have to hope he looked flat enough to keep passing.

Kirishima finally puts on his backpack and pulls open the door of the bathroom, rushing out in the direction of the main school building. He slows a little when he notices that Bakugo has also just finished changing out and is now standing a few feet from him. The spiky-haired boy turns to Eijiro suddenly.

“Hey Shitty Hair!” Eijiro winced a little at the nickname, “Stop doing whatever dumbass shit you did today. I can’t rely on your ass in battle if you’re being a fucking idiot and hurting yourself just to get stronger or some bullshit.”

Eijiro’s eyes widened a little. Does he know…? Bakugo storms off without another word, to which Eijiro breathes a sigh of relief. Looks like he doesn’t. …That was weirdly kind of him, now that I think about it. Eijiro just decides to shrug it off and resumes his rush back to class.

Chapter Text

“Hey Shitty Hair, you look like something’s bothering you, what is it.” Bakugo phrases it like a statement rather than a question.

“Oh it’s nothing really.” Bakugo gives Eijiro a—concerned?—look before dropping the subject.

Ever since Eijiro and his classmates rescued him a week ago, Bakugo has been acting differently from how he usually did—at least around Eijiro. He’s tried bringing it up to his classmates but none of them can really see a difference when Bakugo is around them, not even Midoriya.

Eijiro has also been weighing in his mind whether or not to come clean to Bakugo about who he really is. It almost feels like he’s been lying to him and their other classmates this whole time, hiding his identity even though they’ve been through so much together. But between the recent kidnapping and the constant threat of the villains attacking again, he feels like coming out all of a sudden would just be a burden.

His train of thought is interrupted when Bakugo suddenly pulls him down. Eijiro lands on the couch right next to the other boy before realizing that they’d just been walking in silence until they ended up in the main common area of their new dorms. Bakugo quickly lets go of his hand, crossing his arms and turning his head so Eijiro can’t see his face. That’s weird. Then again, Bakugo’s been turning his head like this pretty often now when he’s around Eijiro.

Eijiro brushes it off and turns to his other classmates who have been sitting and chatting here. After a moment, he realizes that the girls—Mina, Jiro, Asui, and Momo—have started talking about sexualities.

A little too loudly, Mina blurts out, “Oh yeah, I’m a lesbian!” She covered her mouth with one hand and started blushing with embarrassment when she realized the boys—Todoroki, Midoriya, Kaminari, Mineta, and Aoyama—had stopped talking.

Aoyama breaks the ice, “Mon ami, are we sharing sexualities now? Well, I myself like to date anyone, I don’t have a gender preference.” His response seems to change Mina’s embarrassment to excitement very quickly.

“Ooh, why don’t we all go in a circle then? Yao-momo, you’re next!” Mina’s practically bouncing in her seat as she says this.

Yaoyorozu sighs, “I suppose I can share as well. I’m also a lesbian, and I’m transgender too.” Eijiro perks up at that. He looks around and realizes that he’ll be last to go. This would be the perfect opportunity to say something, but just the thought makes anxiety well up in his stomach. He has to clench his fists in order to stop them from trembling or accidentally hardening. Out of the corner of his eye, Eijiro swears he can see Bakugo look over at him.

Eijiro’s once again pulled back to reality as he hears Mineta mutter, “Damn, what a waste of such nice boobs.” From the spot next to him, Kaminari pulls back, eyes wide in shock and disgust. I guess transphobia crosses the line of how much creepy shit he’ll let Mineta say.

The girls start to scold him but go quiet. Before he’s even fully aware of it, Eijiro finds himself standing in front of Mineta. He can feel the eyes of his classmates on him as he raises his arm—unhardened—and smacks the smaller boy hard across the face. Distantly, he thinks, Shit, that’s probably gonna bruise.

“I’m fucking tired of your comments. You need to drop the creepy transphobic bullshit cause I’m sick and tired of you. Fucking man up already.” Mineta’s eyes are wider than Eijiro’s ever seen them and when he turns around to go back to where he was sitting, the eyes of the rest of his classmates’ are too. Right, I don’t think they’ve ever heard me cuss that much or get that angry before.

When he sits back down next to Bakugo, he gets a clap on the back and a grin. Of course, the only one who wasn’t shocked was the king of potty mouths. Mineta is quick to make himself scarce, and no one follows him.

“I don’t usually approve of unnecessary violence, but thank you, Kirishima.” Yaoyorozu speaks up politely.

“Well, that was tense! I’m glad someone finally put him in his place! Jiro, it’s your turn!” Mina quickly recovered and brought everyone’s attention back to the task at hand.

“That was fast.” Jiro commented before Mina leaned over and elbowed her lightly in the side. “Fine, fine. I’m bi.”

Without Mineta’s unwanted commentary, their “game” seemed to go quickly.

“I’m aromantic and asexual.” Asui croaked.

Midoriya nervously muttered, “I-I’m bi, too.”

Todoroki calmly said, “I’m gay.”

Kaminari spoke up with a little less enthusiasm than usual, “I’m also bi. I guess our class really has a lot of bisexuals.”

Finally, it was Bakugo’s turn. Eijiro held his breath as he waited for the boy next to him to respond. It took Mina prompting him, “Hey, Bakugo, are you queer too?” for him to finally say something.

“This is fucking stupid. So what if I am? Why do any of you fuckers wanna know? It’s none of your damn business.” Bakugo snapped, suddenly standing up and turning to Eijiro. “Let’s go, Kirishima.” He must seriously be pissed if he called me by my name.

Eijiro quickly got up and followed him down the hallway towards the elevators. He didn’t dare ask where they were going; Bakugo usually only called him by name when they were alone, never when other people were near enough to hear. He could see Bakugo’s hands clenching and unclenching rapidly, tiny sparks forming around his hands as they moved. Eijiro has the sudden urge to hold his hands.

Bakugo stayed silent as they entered the elevator, the boy simply reaching out and pressing the number for their floor. Well, that narrows down where we’re going. He’s probably just going to disappear into his room.

The doors open and the two of them step out. “So what if I am?” Bakugo’s words echo in Eijiro’s brain as he tries to decipher them. Does that mean he is queer? Maybe he’s into guys… Well, he’d probably never want to date someone like me, though. Even if he is into guys, he might not actually see me as manly enough for him once I tell him the truth.

Eijiro’s thoughts are quieted as he hears the click of a door unlocking. Bakugo pulls the key out of the door lock to his room, turning the knob and opening the door. He walks in, making it to the middle of the space before turning back around to Eijiro.

“Well, come on then, Kirishima.” Bakugo grumbles, once again turning his head away.

Oh. He doesn’t want to piss him off more, so Eijiro quickly steps inside and closes the door behind him. Eijiro awkwardly stands by the door before Bakugo sits down on the edge of his bed and gestures for Eijiro to come sit as well. The red-haired boy walks over and sits down, the two of them only a handful of inches apart.

Bakugo suddenly leans forward and rests his face in his hands, his elbows now propped up on his thighs. He grumbles a muffled, “I hate this.”

Eijiro is quiet for a moment, waiting to see if he’ll elaborate. He doesn’t, so Eijiro quietly responds, “This?”

Bakugo rubs at his face a little. “I’m here struggling with all this bullshit while those fuckers are all happy–go–lucky and unaffected. It’s not fucking fair.” There’s an almost imperceptible wavering to his voice.

Is he… crying? Eijiro resists the urge to reach out and pull Bakugo into a hug. Instead, he simply says, “Yeah, it’s not fair at all.”

The other boy’s head snaps up to look at him. His eyes are red-rimmed and bursting with tears, carving thin trails down the sides of his face. “What would you even know about it? About all the fucking nightmares and flashbacks… the haunting voice that keeps telling me they were right…” His voice has no bite to it anymore, and it cracks at that last part.

“You’re right. I don’t know anything about your situation. I’m sorry.” Eijiro backtracks quickly and forces a small smile, not wanting to anger Bakugo when Eijiro’s just trying to help his best friend.

Bakugo shakes his head. “Fucking hell Kirishima, that’s not what I— I knew there was something wrong and now you won’t fucking tell me just because of all this goddamn bullshit I’m dealing with. You shouldn’t give a shit about how I feel, I’m so fucking mean to you and yet you just keep fucking smiling at me.” Eijiro’s admittedly very taken aback by this.

He quickly asserts, “Of course I care about you, Bakugo. You’re my best friend and I know you can get upset sometimes but you’re not ever doing it to hurt me, are you? …And I just don’t know that now’s a good time to talk about me, I don’t really want to talk about it right now anyways.” Eijiro’s own voice started faltering towards the end, his vision blurring with unshed tears. No, I can’t cry right now. This is about Bakugo, not me.

Bakugo turns his head slightly, now no longer making eye contact. He doesn’t turn his head completely like he’s been doing, though. This time, Eijiro’s able to see how his cheeks have turned red.

He’s quiet as he says, “I don’t want to hurt you, I never did.”

Bakugo is silent for a moment so Eijiro speaks up again, “So you’ve been going through it since the rescue?”

The other boy returns to grinding the heels of his palms into his eyes and laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “That’s a fucking understatement. I can deal with all this bullshit but I get so fucking pissed when I see everyone is so unaffected by everything that happened. No one stops to think about it at all.”

Eijiro’s about to respond when Bakugo speaks up again, reading his mind without even looking at him. “Except for you. You probably wish you got to me faster, don’t you? That you could’ve reached ahead of stupid fucking Deku and grabbed me from that weird fucker’s grip.” He sighs, his shoulders slumping. “Okay, I’ve had enough of this fucking weak, pathetic feelings shit. You can leave.”

Eijiro doesn’t really want to leave his friend behind after he finally opened up a bit, but he knows it’s not really a suggestion so much as a need for some space. Eijiro steels his nerves before reaching out to place a comforting hand on Bakugo’s back for a moment. Surprisingly, his hand stays intact and he’s able to get up and leave without so much as a comment on the physical contact.

Music blasts through his earbuds as Eijiro sits at the desk in his room and tries to do some homework. Key word being ‘tries’ seeing as his thoughts keep drifting from the quadratic formula to Bakugo. Eijiro wasn’t unaware that Bakugo was dealing with a lot of stress following his kidnapping and rescue but he never expected the other boy to actually confide in him.

It made Eijiro’s chest feel warm and fuzzy thinking about how much Bakugo trusted him to have told him all that. He let himself bask in that warmth before cold, hard guilt replaced it just as quickly. His best friend opened up to him but Eijiro was too much of a coward to do the same. On top of that, Eijiro kept having feelings that were very un-best-friend-ly of him to feel.

He leaned against the backrest of his chair and covered his eyes with his hands, trying in vain to block out the images of Bakugo that were haunting his mind. What kind of best friend hides who they are while also harboring romantic feelings? A shitty one, if you ask Eijiro.

Eijiro could feel the guilt seeping into every crevice of his body, filling him until it finally spilled out from his eyes. His unshed tears from just an hour earlier came flooding through, the dam holding them back broken. All Eijiro could do was turn up his music and stifle his sobs with one hand like he had done so many times as a child.

The very last thing Eijiro would want is Bakugo overhearing him crying, especially not him coming to investigate the cause. That thought soon got lost in a massive swirl inside his head, resembling a tornado that just kept getting worse and worse. Eijiro’s mind supplied him with every time Bakugo had told him to die or that Bakugo hated him, along with several hypothetical falling-out scenarios triggered by Eijiro finally coming out.

The red-haired boy started to shake uncontrollably as his thoughts grew further and further out of his reach. His heart was pounding and his chest hurt as he gasped for breaths that were all too lacking in oxygen. It felt like Eijiro was dying, perhaps from a heart attack of some kind.

“Take a deep breath and hold it.” A vaguely familiar voice suddenly echoed in his skull. For some reason, Eijiro found himself compelled to listen to its instructions as he breathed in as much as he could, still feeling as if he wasn’t getting enough air. “Count to 5.” Eijiro’s lungs began to ache slightly. “Now breathe out and hold your breath there as well.” Air rushed out of EIjiro’s pursed lips before he closed them again. “Count to 5, then repeat until you’re calm.”

Eijiro lost count of how many times he followed those instructions until his heart and thoughts finally slowed. It felt almost as if he finally came up for air after struggling underwater, narrowly avoiding drowning. Now that he could think more clearly, Eijiro could identify that he had a panic attack and that the voice he heard was his therapist’s.

Quickly, he opened the notes app on his phone and jotted down the date and approximate time of the attack, along with other relevant information to talk to his therapist about later. It was lucky that her voice broke into his thoughts at that moment, especially since Eijiro was probably on the verge of hyperventilating.

Now that he had recovered fully, Bakugo once again returned to the front of his mind. However, this time Eijiro carefully tried to manage his thoughts to prevent his emotions from tipping over again into dangerous territory. On a whim, he also changed the music that was still blasting in his ears to one of his cheesy, romantic playlists—a welcome change that was calmer and quieter.

Eijiro gave up on finishing his homework; it was due by the end of the week anyway so he moved to flop face-up on his bed. The music choice seemed to have a huge influence on his thoughts as his mind drifted once again to Bakugo.

However, Eijiro didn’t feel guilt this time around, just the fuzzy warm feeling from before. Suddenly his mind supplied him with the thought of Bakugo kissing him and Eijiro could feel his face practically starting to steam. Even just holding Bakugo’s hand for extended periods made his heart pound out of his chest, not to mention the electricity that zipped down his spine the few times Bakugo has whispered in his ear.

Eijiro’s hands covered his face once again, embarrassed from his own thoughts as he could feel the last of his anxiety evaporating from his body and mind. He couldn’t help but smile like an idiot thinking about his best friend.

Chapter Text

As Eijiro stretches with his classmates to prepare for their training for the day, he can feel eyes on him. He doesn’t need to turn around to know Bakugo’s the one watching him, his crimson eyes always following Eijiro’s silhouette. Whenever the red-haired boy turns around to catch his gaze, Bakugo’s face quickly flickers from some concern—Eijiro’s pretty sure now that it’s concern—to his normal scowl as he turns his head away quickly.

It feels a little weird to know Bakugo’s worried about him, but Eijiro is just glad the other boy has stopped pressing him for more information on what’s bothering him. If he kept asking, Eijiro’s sure he wouldn’t be able to keep hiding the truth from him for long. Every time he looks into Bakugo’s beautiful eyes or hears the way Bakugo says his name, it feels as if Eijiro would do anything his best friend asks of him.

Eijiro’s head continues to float up in the clouds as he distantly comprehends Aizawa’s instructions. He doesn’t pay full attention, though, until Eijiro registers a bright, hot light in front of him. He’s unable to fully activate his quirk in time to meet Bakugo’s blast, a blast which the hotheaded boy did not pull any punches with.

A small grunt of pain leaves Eijiro as he feels the skin of his torso is now burning hot. Luckily, they were all in their hero outfits so his shirt stayed intact despite being somewhat scorched. Eijiro reaches his hand to feel the burned skin as he hears Bakugo’s thick-soled shoes stomp over.

“Kirishima! Are you okay?” Bakugo’s tone of voice sounds more worried than Eijiro has ever heard before and his facial expression matches, guilt shining in his eyes.

Eijiro nods, “It’s just a small burn, no need to call Recovery Girl, I’ll be fine.” Aizawa had glanced over when Bakugo ran over and nods before turning away again to his other students’ fights.

Bakugo seems a little relieved but not by much. “At least let me help you, I’ve got a first aid kit in my locker.” The boy insists, to which Eijiro doesn’t argue, instead letting Bakugo drag him over to the boys’ locker room. If Aizawa was concerned by this development, he didn’t show it, though he did glance over one last time.

Bakugo fiddled with the lock for a minute or so before it clicked open and allowed him to pull the creaky metal door open. He quickly found the kit which looked like it was taped hastily to one wall, presumably for easier access. Bakugo snapped the lid of the white box open, revealing various bandages, healing ointments, and wound cleansers.

Without a word, the blond set the kit down next to him on the bench and turned his body to fully face Eijiro. At the sudden eye contact and closeness, Eijiro’s heart skipped a beat as it sped up, his cheeks warming as Bakugo inched closer.

Before Eijiro could ask what he was doing, Bakugo reached a hand towards the shark-toothed boy’s shirt. Eijiro flinched hard and pinned Bakugo’s hand to the lockers by the wrist. He had acted out of pure instinct but now Eijiro could see Bakugo’s face fall a little, traces of hurt swirling in his eyes, which he quickly averted from Eijiro’s gaze.

“I’m sorry Kirishima, I understand if you don’t want me to touch you then I won’t.” Bakugo tried to keep his voice level but Eijiro could pick up on it wavering at the end. He slipped out of Eijiro’s grasp and turned towards the kit, “Maybe you should ask someone else to help bandage you up.”

“Wait, no, that’s not it. I was just a little startled, I don’t like taking off my shirt in front of other people.” Bakugo stilled, waiting for Eijiro to continue. Words tumbled out of his mouth, “I… don’t really mind it when you touch me, just not there.” He sucked in a breath, feeling as if he wasn’t getting enough air all of a sudden. “Sorry, I need some time before I can properly explain it to you. I’m worried you won’t see me the same way… if you knew what my chest looked like.”

Bakugo was silent for a long moment and all Eijiro could think of was that he messed up and said too much. However, when Eijiro’s best friend turned around, he just looked surprised. “...Okay.” He finally settled on before his face started to turn red and his eyes settled on the floor. “You shouldn’t care that much about my opinion, though, Kirishima.”

Without really thinking it through, Eijiro grabbed Bakugo’s hand. He wanted to protest against what the other boy said, but the words died on his tongue the moment that Bakugo leaned his head over to rest on Eijiro’s shoulder. Instead, he muttered, “You can just call me Eijiro, you know.”

Eijiro could feel Bakugo’s surprise again without even looking at him. After a heartbeat, “Fine but you have to call me Katsuki then. Fair’s fucking fair,” came the quiet reply that had less bite than it’d usually carry.

“Deal.”

Eijiro’s sitting in Katsuki’s room studying with the other boy, though he can’t really focus knowing his best friend is lying on the floor right next to him. Eijiro’s eyes keep moving over to Katsuki, whose brow is furrowed in thought as he scowls at the papers in front of him. It’s as if he was willing them to just solve themselves and Eijiro had to desperately hold in a laugh.

Although something must’ve alerted Katsuki since Eijiro soon locked eyes with the other boy, sharp crimson meeting soft red. Katsuki started to move into a sitting position while complaining, “Goddamn it Eijiro, I can’t fucking focus with you staring at me. What’s the fucking matter with you today?”

Eijiro was scrambling for a convincing answer but his mind completely blanked as Katsuki rotated his body so that they were face-to-face, just a few inches apart. Breathe. He had to consciously remind himself since Katsuki seemed to have stolen all the breath he had. Eijiro’s face was on fire by now and his heart was hammering, threatening to burst, but all he could focus on was Katsuki.

The other boy sighed, Eijiro’s eyes involuntarily wandering down to Katsuki’s lips at the motion. Eijiro quickly looked back up and he’s sure his face was now just as red as Katsuki’s captivating eyes. “You’re fucking insufferable.” Katsuki growled before grabbing Eijiro’s collar, pulling him closer.

Just as their lips met, Katsuki’s hot breath fanning over Eijiro’s mouth, Eijiro bolted upright in bed.

He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his palms, groaning as he wondered what woke him up. Whatever it was, Eijiro’s more than a little annoyed at his dream being broken so abruptly. Eijiro’s irritation immediately disappears the moment he hears the sound that most likely had woken him.

Next door, there were explosions and Eijiro could make out Katsuki’s voice which was slightly raised. Is he being attacked? Was all Eijiro could think before he jumped out of bed, barely conscious enough to pull on a hoodie to cover up his sports bra. He quickly opened and closed his door before approaching Katsuki’s.

The doorknob turned easily, making Eijiro’s heart pound in anticipation upon seeing that the door was unlocked. A villain must’ve broken in, he thought hurriedly as he wrenched open the door and rushed inside, skin already hardening.

All he found was Katsuki lying in bed, tossing and turning underneath singed bedsheets. They seemed to be fire resistant but Eijiro shut the door and rushed over anyway to try and redirect Katsuki’s small blasts so as to not set fire to their dorms. The moment Eijiro touched Katsuki’s wrists, the boy started thrashing, talking loudly in his sleep, “No, no. Don’t touch me. Get away. I’m not like you. Let me go.”

Fortunately, Katsuki wasn’t yelling or screaming so none of their classmates would be able to hear him, except for Eijiro. However, what he said made Eijiro’s heart ache and he tried to gently wake the other boy from what seemed to be a nightmare.

“Hey, Katsuki it’s me, Eijiro.” He said in a low voice right by Katsuki’s ear. It took a couple more calls of his name for the blond to wake up. When he did, he immediately bolted upright and turned to Eijiro, looking ready to blast him. Eijiro quickly let go of his wrists and moved to block his face just in case Katsuki still set off a blast.

“…Eijiro?” Katsuki reached out and touched Eijiro’s hardened hands, to which Eijiro reverted them back, lowering them again.

“It’s me, Katsuki. You were having a nightmare.” Katsuki’s eyes still looked wild, like he recognized Eijiro but not any of the words coming out of his mouth. Eijiro carefully looked around for anything that might help him bring Katsuki out of his head fully. His eyes settled on a pill bottle resting on the nightstand, one that he hadn’t noticed before; he didn’t even know Katsuki took any medication.

Upon further examination, the bottle was full of anxiety meds, the label instructing that one capsule be taken with water during an episode of extreme anxiety. Eijiro figured this qualified and quickly darted over to the bathroom sink, grabbing a random empty cup on his way. Katsuki seemed confused and called his name but Eijiro was back after just a moment.

“Sorry, Katsuki, I’m here.” Eijiro held up the pill and the cup that was now filled with water. “Can you swallow this for me? It’ll make you feel better.”

Katsuki took a moment to process his request, but eventually he took the items from Eijiro’s hands. He threw back the pill and water before handing the cup back to Eijiro. It’s then that Eijiro notices Katsuki’s trembling and shallow, rushed breathing, his knuckles white as he grips the sheets.

Eijiro places a hand over one of Katsuki’s, to which the other boy quickly wraps his hand around Eijiro’s, gripping it tightly like a lifeline. “Hey, Katsuki.” The spiky-haired boy looks at him, his eyes slightly glossy and his figure looking smaller than Eijiro has ever seen him.

Suddenly, Eijiro has an idea and reaches out for Katsuki’s other hand, the other boy slowly meeting him partway. Taking his soft, delicate hand, Eijiro moves it so that Katsuki’s hand is resting on his chest, carefully placed right under his collarbone just in case Katsuki remembers this later. “Follow my breathing.” Eijiro instructs.

Deep breath in. Pause for 5 seconds. Deep breath out. Pause for 5 seconds.

At first, Katsuki miserably tries and fails to follow the movements of Eijiro’s chest under his fingers. After about 10 minutes or so, Katsuki’s breathing falls into perfect sync with Eijiro’s, his heartbeat slowing to a normal rate and his trembling stopping.

Katsuki’s eyelids start to droop, an expected, safe side effect of the medication Eijiro gave him. That’s when Eijiro moves Katsuki’s hand back, preparing to do the same with his other hand which is still holding onto Eijiro’s. However, when Eijiro tries to move that hand, Katsuki lets out a small, vulnerable murmur, “Please stay with me. Don’t leave me behind.”

Eijiro hesitates for a long moment, conflicted. He wanted to be there to comfort his best friend but he didn’t want to cross the line, especially considering the feelings that Eijiro harbors for him in secret. It would feel like he was taking advantage of a delirious, confused Katsuki.

Right as he was going to try pulling away again, Katsuki spoke up again, sounding more coherent now. “I don’t want to be alone right now, Eijiro. Just get in the fucking bed.”

Eijiro couldn’t argue with that so he lifted the bed sheets as Katsuki released his hand and moved over to make room for him. It was a bit of a tight squeeze when Eijiro climbed in, Katsuki pressed against the wall but their faces still so close. Eijiro resolved to try not to bother Katsuki and rolled over, attempting to force some space between them.

Having Katsuki so close by should’ve made Eijiro stay up the whole night out of nervousness but Eijiro was so utterly bone-tired that it didn’t really matter. In fact, having Katsuki right beside him made Eijiro feel more comfortable and way less lonely, so he rather quickly drifted off.

Chapter Text

Sunlight filtered in through the window, gently waking Eijiro from the deep, dreamless sleep he had fallen into. It took a moment for Eijiro to process why his room looked different and why there was something wrapped around his torso. His eyes snapped wide open right as he remembered the events of the night before, recognizing the room to be Katsuki’s. As for what was around his torso, Eijiro had to guess it was Katsuki, as strange as that assumption is.

It was as if Katsuki could hear Eijiro wake up since the red-haired boy was suddenly pulled tighter, his back now fully pressed against Katsuki’s stomach. From behind, Eijiro could hear some confused grumbling before Katsuki suddenly released him. Eijiro turned around, pulling himself into a sitting position once he noticed Katsuki was now upright.

The other boy wasn’t looking at Eijiro, though, just staring wide-eyed at nothing, his entire face a brilliant shade of red. Tentatively, Eijiro reached out a hand, resting it on Katsuki’s shoulder, to which the blond quickly turned to meet his gaze. Katsuki’s face turned a shade redder and for a moment Eijiro was distracted by how pretty he looked flustered.

Katsuki was flustered, because of him.

Eijiro must’ve been spaced out for too long since Katsuki promptly snapped at him, “The fuck are you looking at, dumbass?” However, Eijiro was sure he knew Katsuki well enough by now to recognize that he had been caught off-guard.

Still, Eijiro needed to stop drooling and get his shit together, “Nothing, I just wanted to ask if you were doing better now.”

“I don’t need you to worry about me, I’m not a fucking child.” Katsuki barked. Admittedly, Eijiro’s more than a little confused at this reaction.

“I just wanted to check on you, it looked like that nightmare really shook you up last night.”

“Well I don’t want your fucking pity. If you’re just going to treat me like I’m some goddamn fragile glass, then get the fuck out of my room.” Katsuki turned away from Eijiro, though he could’ve sworn he saw the other boy’s eyes shine with unshed tears.

Eijiro knew he crossed the line when he gave in to Katsuki’s request last night. He knew but he did it anyway because he’s selfish and wanted to pretend for a moment that he and Katsuki weren’t just best friends. Thanks to that, Eijiro wasn’t even sure if he could call them friends anymore.

He always ruined everything.

————————————————

“Kirishima, are you okay?” Yaoyorozu says in a concerned tone, taking in his disheveled appearance and puffy eyes.

“Can I come inside?” Is all he can manage as an explanation right now.

She opens the door wider and steps to one side of the doorway. “Yeah of course, but what happened—” Yaoyorozu’s cut off as Eijiro walks past her and inside, plopping down on the small amount of floor space in front of her massive bed.

Yaoyorozu just closes her door and walks over to where Eijiro is now sitting. She sits down in front of him, the two of them a little close due to the limited space with all of Yaoyorozu’s expensive furniture crowding around.

“Okay, what on earth happened?” She says, searching his face as if it could tell her the answer by itself.

Eijiro sighs. “Well, before I tell you what happened, there’s something else you need to know for context. Something I haven’t told anyone else in our class.” Yaoyorozu nods silently, urging him to continue. Eijiro takes a breath. “I’m a trans guy. I’ve been stealth this whole time so I wouldn’t get bullied again. I feel terrible for lying but I’m so scared to tell anyone.”

Yaoyorozu’s eyes lit up with understanding. “Ah, so since you heard that I’m trans too you came to me for help. You weren’t lying to me, though; you did it to protect yourself and I can understand why you’d choose to not tell our class right away. …Did someone find out or something? Is that what you want to talk to me about?”

Eijiro shook his head, fighting back the tears that started to return to his eyes. “No, no one found out. It’s just…” Eijiro proceeded to give Yaoyorozu a short summary of what’s happened recently between him and Katsuki. He did cut out a bit of what the other boy went through to help protect his privacy. Eijiro knows the last thing Katsuki’d want is for Yaoyorozu to know about everything he’s been going through since the rescue.

When Eijiro is done speaking, it takes a moment for Yaoyorozu to respond. “…Well, that’s a lot… Sorry if this is a little rude but I didn’t expect you to have a thing for Bakugo of all people.” Eijiro gives her a small, somewhat forced smile. She quickly continues, “Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course. Do you have any idea why he’d suddenly snap at you like that?”

“I’m not too sure… I can’t help but think that I crossed the line when I agreed to sleep over. Maybe I made him uncomfortable. I’m just worried this means he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore.” Eijiro started to fidget with the strings of his hoodie, a nervous habit he’s been trying to stop doing around others.

Yaoyorozu gave him a sympathetic look and paused for a moment, thinking. “I’m certainly not as close to Bakugo as you are and probably can’t tell how he feels as well as you can, but… He acts so differently around you than he does anyone else, even Midoriya. I don’t know for sure but judging from the way he looks at you and talks to you, I’d say you’re one of his only close friends and I’m hesitant to agree that he’d throw that all away so easily. After all, he did ask you to spend the night with him.”

Eijiro considered what she said for a while, and eventually Yaoyorozu continued her train of thought, “This is just my hypothesis, but maybe it scared him to realize he had been that vulnerable with you and that you didn’t run away. From what you said, it seems like he always expects you to leave him whenever he shows his actual emotions or confides in you.” All Eijiro could do was nod slowly in response.

The red-haired boy soon became lost in thought, trying to view all of Katsuki’s recent behavior through the perspective Yaoyorozu just offered him. Before he knew it, she sat back down in front of him, this time with two steaming cups of tea, one of which she offered to Eijiro.

Eijiro took one long sip, letting the tea fill his system with a subtly sweet and floral warmth. “Thanks. I think you might actually be right, I didn’t even stop to consider if that was the case. I must’ve been too caught up in worrying over our friendship to have picked up on that.”

“Speaking about that, did you want to talk about the other elephant in the room? It seems like you’ve been worrying about how to come out to him for a lot longer than whether or not he can pick up on your crush.” Eijiro’s unsure how she does it but Yaoyorozu just casually reads him like a book before returning to sipping on her tea.

Right, that elephant. The whole reason I even thought about coming to ask Yaoyorozu for help in the first place. Eijiro sighs, “Yeah… I’m not sure I can even bring myself to tell him. Even if he does still consider me a friend now, I’m not confident I would be able to say the same after I finally reveal the truth to him. Not only will he see me in a different light but he probably won’t want anything to do with me when he realizes I had been hiding it from him this whole time. I feel like such an asshole best friend.” Eijiro buries his face in his palms, his teacup all but abandoned now.

Eijiro can’t see the look on Yaoyorozu’s face but he can hear her voice wavering slightly as she responds, “I know how you feel. I haven’t always been this comfortable being open about my identity myself, you know. Unfortunately I did lose a lot of friends when I first came out, even some friends who I thought knew me well enough that they’d look past my gender being different from what they had assumed. It’s never easy to break that news to someone you know and care for so deeply.”

Yaoyorozu takes a deep breath, continuing with a steadier, more determined voice, “But even though I can’t read his mind, I don’t think Bakugo is like those people I used to know. Heck, I’d even go so far as to say that he wouldn’t blame you for not telling him all this time. He’s probably more worried about you than suspicious, at the very least. On top of that, I can personally vouch that you’re not a bad, selfish friend. Now, he probably will see you at least a little differently, but that’s not always a bad thing because at least then he will see you for who you truly are.” She paused for a moment. “Or at least, that’s my take.”

Eijiro had to hold back from crying all over again; albeit for a different reason. Instead, he just lifted his head up and let his hands fall to his lap once more. “...I’m not sure that I’m super ready yet, but I’ll keep your words in mind. Thanks, Yaoyorozu.” Eijiro offered her his signature shark-toothed grin, a genuine one that spread across his face, making his eyes crinkle slightly.

She smiled back, waving off his overly polite tone with one hand, “Oh, just call me Momo. I think we’re close enough now if I’ve witnessed your mental breakdown.” Eijiro can’t help but chuckle at that.

“Momo it is.”

————————————————

Eijiro slowly walked back to his dorm room, hesitant to come across Katsuki so soon after being kicked out of the spiky-haired boy’s room. By the time Eijiro unlocked his door, he hadn’t seen a glimpse of the other and took the opportunity to try and make himself a little more presentable. It was already noon and Eijiro still had some serious bedhead—and probably smelled a little bad, too.

He grabbed some fresh underwear from his dresser, quickly shutting the door to the bathroom and turning on the showerhead. Eijiro was fast to get in, not wanting to let himself glance at the mirror hanging above the sink. Unfortunately, this did mean that the water was a little colder than he’d like.

So far, the testosterone made a huge improvement in regards to Eijiro’s dysphoria, however it wasn’t entirely gone. Eijiro just wasn’t old enough to get top surgery yet so he had to make do in the meantime. This meant he would make sure to avoid mirrors whenever he was in a state of undress and that he would have to be very time-efficient when showering. That way, Eijiro could (mostly) avoid triggering a dysphoria-induced spiral.

Eijiro turned the water off, getting out with his back to the mirror and reaching for his towels. One he used to tousle his hair, the other he used to pat himself dry—another part of showering that he had gotten to be very efficient and quick with. Now dry, he looked towards his clothes, deciding to just pull on everything but his hoodie. This left him in just a sports bra and some shorts, which was sufficient for right now since Eijiro just wanted to lay in bed for a bit to think over what Momo had told him.

Maybe in a half hour or so he’d throw something else on and summon enough courage to go downstairs and eat some lunch. Perhaps he wouldn’t even bump into Katsuki for the rest of the day. Eijiro opened the bathroom door and froze.

So much for trying to avoid Katsuki since the boy in question was sitting on his floor, looking at him. Fuck. Katsuki registered Eijiro’s appearance and quickly jumped up to a standing position, one hand averting his eyes as he stared at the floor.

“Fucking shit, Eijiro, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—” Katsuki abruptly cuts himself off, turning around and bolting out the door. An unhelpful part of Eijiro’s brain now recalls that he did indeed forget to lock the door behind him.

Chapter Text

Eijiro shoves that thought away as he once again frantically pulls on a random hoodie, this time one he had to grab from his dresser. He’s barely able to put it on the right way around, too focused on trying to catch up to Katsuki as quickly as possible. He had to make this right.

The red-haired boy practically bursts out of his room, this time taking a moment to lock the door behind him before speed-walking down the hallway towards the elevators. All Eijiro can hear is the rush of blood in his ears as he anxiously waits for the elevator to open. Finally, the elevator dings and the doors aren’t even fully opened when Eijiro squeezes through, narrowly avoiding hitting his shoulders on the hard metal.

He resumes his speed walk before stumbling upon Midoriya walking side-by-side with Todoroki. Eijiro catches up to them, startling the green-haired boy with his sudden appearance. “Kirishima! A-are you ok?”

“Midoriya, do you know where Katsuki is?” Eijiro asks hurriedly. He’d have to explain and apologize to Midoriya later but right now he couldn’t waste any time.

The shorter boy looked confused for a moment before responding, “I saw Kacchan head towards the training grounds right next to the dorms, I hope you can find him.”

Eijiro took off again in that direction, turning his head to give Midoriya a thank-you over his shoulder.

It didn’t take long for Eijiro to get to the training grounds Midoriya had mentioned, especially considering that he was free to actually break into a run once he went outside. However, he couldn’t see anyone, let alone the boy he was looking for. Eijiro walked over to the side of the training area, leaning against a tree to catch his breath and try to figure out where Katsuki might’ve gone.

He didn’t have to look far, though, when Eijiro heard some sniffling and caught a glimpse of familiarly spiky blond hair. Eijiro carefully walked around to the other side of the tree, finding Katsuki sitting at its base, his arms wrapped around his knees and his head hanging low. Upon hearing his footsteps, the other boy’s head quickly snapped up, his eyes flicking over to meet Eijiro’s, sparkly crimson pouring into dull red.

Katsuki immediately ducked his head away, hiding his tear-stained face from Eijiro. Before the shark-toothed boy could even think of what to say, Katsuki’s voice cut through the silence, “I’m so fucking sorry Eijiro. I must be the worst friend you could ever have asked for.” Katsuki chuckled bitterly, lacking any humor whatsoever.

What? “I mean, I treated you like shit ever since we first met, even though you tried so hard to be nice to me and to treat me like a goddamn human being. And then I go and dump all my shitty problems on you without ever considering your feelings first. I can’t ever go fucking easy on you either and even though I thought you might’ve been distracted that day I blasted you anyways.

“Then last night I just fucking used you being overly kind to help make me feel better about myself. And the icing on that cake of shit was me not only lashing out at you for being too nice but also outing you when you weren’t ready to fucking tell me yet.”

It sounded like Katsuki was about to start crying again or maybe he already did, Eijiro couldn’t tell. Nevertheless, he continued on, “I’m just such a horrible, shitty person and I know that but I can’t stop feeling so fucking guilty about all of it. I just wanted to apologize for what I said to you this morning but now look at what that turned into.”

Oh. Eijiro took a moment to let everything Katsuki said sink in, a length of time which probably just served to make the other boy feel worse. “Katsuki, I couldn’t ask for a better friend than you and I’d never want you to be anything other than your usual self. Sure, things didn’t start off the best but I was one stubborn son of a bitch and wouldn’t leave you alone like you kept asking me to. I also never felt upset about you sharing how you felt with me, it just made me feel like you trusted me and that’s what friends are for.

“Me getting burned was entirely my fault and I’m still embarrassed that it even happened. And last night you didn’t use me, I made the conscious decision to check on you and to keep you company. I will admit I felt a little hurt when you snapped at me like that but after I calmed down I realized that we would figure it out. You suddenly appearing out of nowhere scared me but I was the one who forgot to lock the door like an idiot and I was probably going to tell you sooner or later.”

Eijiro took a deep breath, his heart pounding a little in anticipation of how Katsuki would react. The blond suddenly turned towards him and pulled him into a hug; a reaction which caught Eijiro totally off-guard. After a moment of shock, the red-haired boy wrapped his arms around Katsuki, pulling him even closer. All Eijiro’s senses could process was Katsuki and for a long, gentle moment it felt like it was just them all alone in the universe together.

“At least some of your weird behavior makes sense now.” Katsuki murmured in a light, teasing tone directly into Eijiro’s ear, the sound of which sent a wave of electricity down his spine.

Oh right he knows I’m trans now. “About that… doesn’t it make you think I’m less manly?” Eijiro nervously asks, barely able to get the words to come out of his mouth. The accidental-coming-out part was easy compared to this.

Katsuki pulls away from Eijiro just enough that his hands have slid down to the shark-toothed boy’s waist. He had Eijiro practically sitting in his lap now, a deeply incredulous look on Katsuki’s face as his voice returns to its normal volume, “The fuck? You’re literally the manliest fucking guy I know, you being trans doesn’t make that any less true.

“And before you pull some ‘do you still want to be my friend’ bullshit get it through your thick fucking skull that no matter who you are I will always feel the same way about you. You’re the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me Eijiro and you better not take that shit lightly cause I fucking like you the way you are.”

That last part seemed to shock not only Eijiro but also Katsuki himself, judging by the look on his face. His face turned the same beautiful shade of red as it did that morning and his eyes were just as wide. Eijiro could tell now that Katsuki was about ready to run away again so he quickly blurted out, “I like you too Katsuki.” He nervously continued, “I have for a while, which was part of the reason why I was so worried about coming out to you…” Eijiro trailed off when he saw the look Katsuki was giving him.

“Just kiss me you fucking dumbass.” Katsuki practically growled.

Eijiro wasted no time leaning in closer, but hesitated a bit, to which Katsuki just grabbed the collar of his hoodie and pulled him in the last couple of inches. Their lips meet gently, Katsuki seemingly unsure of what to do next. As Eijiro takes the lead, part of him feels somewhat proud that he’s probably Katsuki’s first kiss. He moves their lips in a tentative rhythm which Katsuki soon tries to match; for once, the other boy seems content to follow someone else’s pace.

Eventually, their lips part as the two of them try to catch their breath. Eijiro can’t help but stare at how beautifully messy Katsuki looks now; his lips red, face flushed and eyes looking slightly dazed. Eijiro snaps out of it as the other boy pulls him back in, this time taking a rough lead which the red-haired boy was more than happy to follow.

Now that’s the Katsuki I know. Eijiro thought just before the other boy wiped his mind completely clean, biting softly at his lower lip. Eijiro couldn’t help how his mouth parted at the sharp but somewhat pleasant sensation, Katsuki taking the opportunity to swipe his tongue over the shark-toothed boy’s lightly bleeding lip.

However, it seemed to Eijiro like Katsuki was trying his best to take things slow as the blond decided to return to their earlier, gentler pace. Katsuki pressed kiss after kiss against Eijiro’s lips before they finally parted for air, this time with finality.

The moment Eijiro caught his breath, he couldn’t help but ask, “Was that your first kiss, Katsuki?”

The spiky-haired boy glared at him, but there was a fondness in his eyes that Eijiro hadn’t ever noticed before. “Don’t you dare tell any of those fuckers.”

Eijiro raised his hands in front of his chest in mock defense, “I would never, that’d be super unmanly of me.” Katsuki let out a small chuckle, a light smile settling on his face.

“I’m glad you were my first.” The other boy admitted softly before returning to his regular tone of voice, “That’s it, I’m done with this sappy fucking bullshit.” Katsuki stood up, offering his hand to Eijiro who took it without a second thought.

Whether or not they walked back to their dorms hand-in-hand was none of their classmates’ business.

————————————————

Eijiro and Katsuki had been dating for about a month and while Eijiro was over the moon, he could still feel the weight of his classmates’ ignorance of his identity heavy on his shoulders. At the very least, Eijiro was pretty sure their class knows about his and Katsuki’s relationship, if their teasing looks and remarks are anything to go off of.

Katsuki pulled Eijiro out of his mind with a short, sweet kiss that made Eijiro’s heart melt a little. “Are you worrying about it again?” The other boy questioned in an uncharacteristically soft tone.

“Yeah…” Eijiro admitted as Katsuki smacked the back of his head. “Ow! What’s that for?”

“You being a fucking idiot. If it bothers you this much, you should probably fucking say something before your brain explodes from all your goddamn thinking.” Despite his harsh words, Katsuki’s voice and face betrayed his careful concern.

Eijiro sighed. “Maybe you’re right,” Katsuki’s eyes widened as Eijiro hesitantly asked, “Do you think you could help me? Even just having you next to me would help me avoid panicking.”

The blond’s face turned red at Eijiro’s words, though he almost immediately replied with a firm, determined, “Of–fucking–course I will.”

————————————————

Eijiro really wasn’t sure what to expect when Katsuki volunteered to help, but it definitely wasn’t this.

Their classmates were spread around the main common room, which now felt a little crowded, considering that it was extremely rare that all of them would be gathered here at once. Right in the middle of it all stood Katsuki, a scowl on his face that softened a little when he turned to look at Eijiro, the red-haired boy’s heart fluttering a little.

Katsuki nodded at him, waving him over before turning back to their classmates and barking, “Kirishima has something to tell you fuckers so listen up. If you interrupt him I’ll blow your fucking face off.”

Eijiro couldn’t help but grin at his boyfriend, who was clearly trying his best to be helpful. Judging by the looks on their classmates’ faces, only a few of them were able to pick up on the kindness behind the gesture—the rest of them looked more than a bit scared.

Once Katsuki stopped trying to pick a fight with the entire class, all eyes were focused squarely on Eijiro, his anxiety finally setting in and preventing him from speaking. His hands started to tremble slightly as he resisted the urge to fidget with them, almost feeling as if he was holding in a sneeze. Eijiro’s jaw was involuntarily clenched, refusing to open at all as his whole body felt heavy and immovable, completely paralyzed in fear.

He felt Katsuki’s hand wrap itself around his, rubbing soothing circles into the back of Eijiro’s hand. “Breathe.” Katsuki whispered, quiet enough that only Eijiro could hear him. The shark-toothed boy took a couple deep breaths before he felt himself calm down enough to finally open his mouth to speak the words he had thought over countless times before.

“I wanted to let you all know that I’m transgender.

"I always have been, I was just scared to be openly trans again at school after I had been bullied in middle school. I’m sorry it took me this long to be honest about it, though. You are all such good friends to me that I want you guys to be able to know the real me. I hope you can accept me.”

The moment those last few words left his mouth, Eijiro was smothered in a hug from Mina as she eagerly announced, “You’re still our Kirishima, I for one don’t care at all about your assigned gender, your actual gender is what matters!”

Katsuki quickly distanced himself to avoid being caught in the crossfire, though Eijiro could see the fond look in his crimson eyes. After a moment, Eijiro’s classmates started to crowd around him, a few joining the hug while others simply voiced their support.

Momo was one of the first classmates to follow Mina as she quickly joined the group hug before pulling away again, a smile on her face as she says, “I’ll always be here if you need someone to talk to who relates to you and your struggles.”

The room went a little quiet as Todoroki spoke up as well in his deadpan voice, “If we accepted Bakugo we can accept you too.” Eijiro couldn’t help the laugh that burst out of him, his classmates barking with laughter as Katsuki’s face burned red. The blond was quick with a retort and Eijiro couldn’t help but smile as everything seemed to go back to normal.

Everyone joined in the mini-celebration except for Mineta, for obvious reasons. Eijiro noted that the pervert didn’t say anything, though, just sitting in the corner glowering at the floor. Apparently, Aizawa had informed him that he was on thin ice and one more incident would get him expelled from UA—and effectively banned from every other hero school in the country. Eijiro shrugs it off, he didn’t want the creep anywhere near him anyways.

Eijiro was admittedly quite taken aback by the enthusiastic response from his classmates, but he quickly returned the group hug, holding back tears. With such amazing friends by his side, Eijiro couldn’t help but love the person he’s becoming—one who is confident, happy, supported, and loved for who he is.